With Continual Reference to Justin Kahn.

Monday, October 15, 2007

Justin Raises a Stink About the Nobel Prize: Part One of What is the First One Part Series of Recent Memory.

(Pictured Al Gore, upon receiving the Nobel Prize.)

According to a highly reliable source of mine, a Cleveland Newspaper that would sue me for linking to them, the decision was recently made to award the Nobel Prize to Al Gore for his "contributions to global warming."

Frankly, I am outraged.

Call me crazy, but I don't think that we should applaud someone who is contributing to Global Warming. And if we are, I think I should get the award.

I.myself,go out of my way to buy and destroy large quantities of Styrofoam, to run my lawn mower year round and to kill as many trees as possible by writing stories that will never see the light of day in my Moleskin notebooks (the brand of Picasso, Hemingway and others who hate Trees!)

That is why I want you to think of Justin for the Nobel Prize in 2009.

I will even take the one for Economics.

Thank you.

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

You are not worthy.

Lindz said...

Okay Justin I didn't read your rant about something or another, but will you go see that movie with me ASAP. I finished the book that took me 4 years to read last night and I need to go see the movie, because now I am curious. So how about Tuesday or Wednesday at 7:45. Puhlease.

Lindz

Justin said...

Lindz,
Another way you could have pitched it was to punch me in the stomach and then ask me to go see a movie.

In pain,
j.

Justin said...

Thanks anonymous. Or should I say, Not the Nobel Prize Awards People!!
j.

maleah said...

Oh, come on, Justin. Be a girl! We get asked out and the guy doesn't care what we have to say, either! Just put on something pretty and go. I'm sure she likes your mind, too.

Shannon R. said...

Hold it.

Just because I'm married to a wonderful and bright monkey does not mean that I don't occassionally get jealous of other men (or monkeys) to which I have made no vows.

Are you going on a date!!??

Lindz said...

Justin,

This is not a date. I repeat this is not a date, but it is more like me forcing you to see a movie with me. Because you should feel bad that you ended our sacred vows of marriage in the far far faraway future over a blog that I never read. Not thats a punch in teh stomach. So when are we going?

Lindz

Comrade Kevin said...

J. Most women save the punch in the stomach for after the date.

fatboyfat said...

I never used to respect a girl if she punched me in the stomach before the third date.

Those were the days. You tell the kids this today, and you know what? They won't believe you.

alecia said...

i just like to punch people in the face. that's more fun.

Same anonymous said...

Justin, I'm speaking honestly.

You are very lucky to have such a magnificent and caring girlfreind.
I envy you.
Truly.


Signature: Same Anonymous that left the first comment

Oliver Knight said...

Who's she, she's pretty.