With Continual Reference to Justin Kahn.

Monday, October 22, 2007

Leo the Entertainer.

When he takes the stages, there is no one else like him. Not Elvis or Tom Jones or Larry King.

People-who I have no desire to talk to- stop their car to say Hi. To watch him sit, stand, sit, shake hands.

But when he isn't in the little puppy lime light, it is an altogether different story--a story so horrifying that it is worth your time to read to the end of the post.

He is like an empty shell.

In the morning he takes uppers, and in evening he takes downers. In between he takes Schmako's Bacon Strips! ®

(The vet says Schmako's Bacon Strips! ® are fine, so I'm not so worried about that. But the vet also prescribed Heartguard with E ®, so you have to wonder.)

Sure Leo can be abusive and cruel, but mostly I just worry about him.

I tell him that, the despairing refusal to be oneself, is the root of every evil.

Leo doesn't even pretend to listen anymore. He runs the brush through his hair, and makes for the stage.

I wait in the wings, knowing that one day the crowd will turn their collective back on him.


maleah said...

Larry King?

Justin said...

You are right--I should have put him first in my list of great entertainers.


Lindsey said...

So you think Leo is dangerous... Maggie is deadly. Aside from my black eye and broken nose. I now am bleeding internally. All because she didn't want to play fetch.

Justin said...

Lindz( I hope that what you mean by "Lindsey."),

Leo is dangerous, it is just that you are really weak. If maggie attacked me, it wouldn't leave a scratch.

Anyway, thanks for not seeing a movie with me yesterday at 5:30.


P.S If something really did happen, I will feel terrible.

P.P.S. Maybe not terrible...but pretty bad.

Lindz said...

Justin (or shall I say J),

Thanks for not calling me. And yes something did happen. Maggie gave me a shiner. It is brutal to admit you people at work that my dog beat me up.

Well let me know when you are available to see the movie.


Comrade Kevin said...

Hopefully he doesn't beat you with a wire hanger!

Anonymous said...


Justin said...

Anonymous--Still the same anonymous?

Justin said...

Comrade K,
Of course not! He doesn't like the crease metal hangers leave on his doggie pants. So he buys these real nice wooden ones--they sure do hurt ,though!


Justin said...

Lindz, Stop trying to get sympathy from my readers! They need to save their powers of pity for me--and me alone!

Anonymous said...

yes I am!
screennames turn me off

Justin said...

Am to understand that you weren't given a name at birth?

How tragic.


Cambridge said...

I too like dogs.

I got together with my last four boyfriends because of a dog.

Those were the best four minutes of my life.

Justin said...


Wow, this dog you speak off, sounds more effective than match.com