With Continual Reference to Justin Kahn.

Monday, June 25, 2007

Theoretically, I Could Be Crass.



I have spent more money on Dimethyl Sulfoxide in the last week than most men do all year.

Parents: Teach your kids about life. Buy them a Dimethyl Sulfoxide. Otherwise they will hit puberty and believe that paint peels itself.

Every penny I spend on Dimethyl Sulfoxides is well spent.

Nothing to make housework more enjoyable than having a half dozen Dimethyl Sulfoxide around to help you.

If you can't afford a Dimethyl Sulfoxide you could always try sulfoxide or sulfone, which has similar solvent properties. (This paragraph isn't meant to flirt with crassness. Just trying to be informative.)

15 comments:

maleah said...

at least you kept it kleen.

Taihae said...

I go away for mere weeks in good faith, and return to find the floor COVERED in used strippers. What would Mama Kahn say, Justin?

Justin said...

taihae,
Probably, 'Is that Taihae single.'

j.

Justin said...

Maleah,

I believe it is spelled clean.

j.

Misha said...

I met the infamous Lindz at Parnell's the other night. We played darts and talked about how you never leave the house, and she gave me your phone number so now I can text you whenever I want to remind you how you never leave the house. Cheers!

Justin said...

Misha,
Fantastic. Now I can delete Lindz's number so I don't have any redundancies.

j.

maleah said...

Actually I think it is klean. Let's call it a a draw.

Mary Lois said...

I think it's spelled sardoodledom.

alecia said...

caribou is fucking CLOSED.
i need a job.
roarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
anyone have any suggestions?

Justin said...

UGHWHAT? NO! I THOUGHT YOU SAID TUESDAY WAS FREE DRINKS? I WAS GOING TO GO TONIGHT.

ARGGGGGHHHH.

PLUS I THOUGHT YOU WERE GETTING TRANSFERRED.

alecia said...

tomorrow morning they are giving free coffee out util 1130 am on the sidewalk. that's the last hurrah.

yeah i'm transferred to the la place joint but i hate it there. i'm on the hunt for a job...

maleah said...

Well, Aster, it seems J is in need of a professional stripper...

alecia said...

haha yeah i don't do that.

Angry Gnome said...

Ah, it's nice to know that while I've been away you've still kept on trucking.

Too_Lively said...

If you spill Dimethyl Sulfoxide on yourself, you will be the one stripping. Ha, ha! That was funny. Uh, yeah.