With Continual Reference to Justin Kahn.

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

One Minute You Are the Most Important Blogger in the Fourth Quadrant of Cleveland Hts.; The Next Minute You Are The Poster Boy for Endless Suffering.

I am trying so hard to keep my 'chin up' and 'my head above the water' and 'to accentuate the positive and something, something, something.' But it is not easy. Without my television I have an extra 14 hours a day of pointless existence. Without Bookie, I have no means to transport my books out of my personal library.

I know this is Wed. and so you probably are expecting a run of the mill post and NOT YET MORE EVIDENCE THAT NOTHING I DO EVER WORKS OUT AND THERE APPEARS TO BE SOME OVEWHELMING, POWERFUL FORCE TRYING TO DESTROY ME.

Brace yourself.

Without any other means of entertainment, I decided to turn to mankind's oldest recreation: Crossword Puzzles. But even this timeless source of amusement ended only in frustration. They don't even come with clues anymore.

I spent three hours last night trying to solve one before I decided to admit it as further evidence that if I survive this week it is only because I have preternatural sources of internal strength and wisdom.

20 comments:

Christina said...

Behold! I linked to your blog. Your position in the technocrati is secure.

I also look like a great big not good user of words next to you, which is probably the only thing William Safire and I will ever have in common.

goldennib said...

OK Justin - this self pity party you are having is unattractive. Man up!

Anonymous said...

Justin - This is the aliens who are trying to contact you. Buy a new TV so we can watch Andy Griffith re-runs.

The Aliens

Justin said...

Christina, I am truly honored by your link and yet at the same time curious as to why more people don't begin comments with a the elegant, 'Behold!'

Thank you, once again, for taking into consideration my repeated and desperate pleas for a link.

Behold: That is all.
justin

Justin said...

goldennib, Your method of 'reverse flirtation' is no more effective than most examples of reverse psychology. Sorry. j.

Justin said...

Hey Aliens, Please don't be afraid of me! Nice of you to stop my blog,though. Your message isn't clear. Are you coming over when I'm not home and watching my television?

And andy griffith?

J.
P.S. Wait, you don't take the shape of a rat do you?

P.P.S. Can I still kill you by stabbing the base of the neck?

marisa said...

LOL, I thought this was a very funny post!

bitingblondewit said...

Um, Justin? That's not a crossword, that's Sudoko or something like that. Maybe if you tried a puzzle with words... That could make all the difference...especially since you have such a way with words:)

Taihae said...

justin - would it make you feel better to know that I'm severely attracted to dangerous men? and whats more dangerous than a man whos got an overwhelming, powerful force out to destroy him?

Justin said...

taihae,It is refreshing to see a lady who doesn't distinguish between an endangered man and a dangerous man. j.

Princess in Galoshes said...

Brilliant.

I fully intend to integrate smiley faces into any Sudokus I ever do, ever again.

Nice blog!

SNAKE HUNTERS said...

There's a certain Irony in bumping
into a fellow like Justin...

He uses words effectively, he has
studied religious notions, and I suspect he knows War, and he is not
fooled by Political Hot-Air.

I believe this guy would appreciate
our Reality-based Snake Hunters Weblog. All who know and like him
are also invited to our comment section. Check 'History' Post.

Record a first name & town. reb

www.lazyonebenn.blogspot.com

Taihae said...

oh, no problem there. The doctor says I have no ability to recognize patterns. And also that I'm not "technically" a lady. And then he touched me down there, and it made me sorta uncomfortable. But then he gave me a lollypop so I guess that's okay!

Metamorphosis said...

Hi there. My mothers TV also broke - saw your other posting. Gave her mine so now I don't have a TV either. As you, I'm trying to write a novel, but I think all the "buzzing" from the world takes my attention away from working on it. But I wish you good luck. Greetings from Norway – my blog: http://metamorphosis2-metamorphosis.blogspot.com/

Anonymous said...

Justin - You are a little scary, especially when you talk about killing us.

We can take many forms. Sometimes rats, sometimes cats and for Halloween, it's bats. We can even become invisible. We have watched TV when you weren't home but occasionally we have sat next to you on your couch.

And why do you hate Andy? He's one of us, you know.

The Aliens

Maleah said...

9 down is VILE... but the E is backwards for some reason.

Comrade Kevin said...

Justin, It's one thing to stick with the French extensionalists to deal with your deep emotional loss but I think you've crossed the line straight to the German Nihilists. Crawl back from the abyss my friend!

Justin said...

Comrade K. You so crazy. I have no idea what you are talking about with the French Ex-a-ma-callits. To say nothing of the German Niddleypooops. I am a simple man who find comfort only by following his heart. And heart is something, I think you agree, that neither the French nor the Germans have. j.

Justin said...

maleah, Crossword Puzzle Makers just don't have the pride they used to have in their craft. But thanks for the tip. Crossword puzzles are so much more fun when other people give you the answers. J.

Angry Gnome said...

Chin up, Justin. Things are never as bad as we think they are. Or maybe they are and we are really in tune with ourselves. Who knows.