With Continual Reference to Justin Kahn.

Friday, May 19, 2006

This is Not Made Up---Fan Mail Friday: I Would Have Started on my 42 Pounds of Literary Wonderfulness, but I Was Too Giddy B/C of This

Hi, my name is Brad and I am a senior in high school in Texarkana, Texas. In my school you have to either take a theatre or an art class in order to graduate, so this year I took Theater I. For our "final exam" we have to do a monologue in front of the whole school. For my monologue I chose the "Short Imagined Monologue" you wrote about the Microsoft Word Paper Clip on McSweeney's, and really love it. I made a costume out of pool noodles wrapped in duct tape with huge cardboard eyebrows. I performed it yesterday, and even though I accidentally skipped a line in the middle, it went over fantastically. Everyone got major laughs. So, thank you for writing it and have a great day!

**
Postscript: All this month, portion of the profits from my cafe press store will go towards creating a trust fund for Brad, so that he can perform further adaptations of my work or even just do whatever he wants. I don't care . C'mon. Someone buy something.

I hope everyone has a fantastic weekend. As soon as I stop giggling, I'm going to plunge into creating my 42 pounds of aesthetic bliss. The Futre of America is depending on me.

19 comments:

marrisa said...

CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Texarkana,today,Broadway tomorrow!!

martini_melancholy said...

In response to your mission...repetition creates density. Density equals more pounds per square inch. Haiku is generally very dense.

Paper clips aren't dense, but they are quite sassy.

Jody said...

You do Cafe Press T-shirts? Are you, like, the man in charge? I LOVE Cafe Press T's. I bought an "I Heart Idaho" one last year.

This kid seems pretty awesome. I work with a guy from Texarkana- I'll be sure to tell him about this!!!

Jenn said...

You know if you do succeed in creating the 42 pounds, you would be more prolific than Dickens and Tolstoy and Hugo (Victor) put together.

And Dickens used to write non-stop from eight in the morning to two in the afternoon. Like, EVERY DAY!

N@ Lauzon said...

You are fan-friggin'-tastic!
Glad I stumbled on your blog today.

WEEEEEEEEE!

schoud said...

Nice costume
:)

jabee said...

good luck with the 42 pounds! whenever i set myself a goal like that i immediatly get writers block... tsk!

WIP said...

hey justa-roni

i'm saying that just to throw you off

Justin said...

wip-a-doodle:
I indeed need to be thrown off. Now, more than ever.

JDK

Federico said...

Very nice....

:-)

margot said...

your blog is brilliant. may you never devolve into producing drivel. this blog is really the cat's meow. thanks.

Choux*Pastry*Heart said...

love the pic

lalatinx said...

I am so completely chuffed that someone else has contemplated the life of the Microsoft Assistant Paper Clip. I'm always filled with such guilt when I kick it off the screen. Now I shall feel even guiltier, possibly even start using it. And very truthfully, I think that Texas kid is ruddy genius.

Chuck said...

That is friggin funny.

Vinny said...

There are few phrases in the English language as charming as "pool noodle." Maybe something with the word "nozzle" in it might be better, but I'm pretty skeptical. So glad I stumbled on your blog this evening.!

Justin said...

Vinny:


According to Linguist, Noam Chomsky, Nozzle Noodle is the most charming phrase in the English language. So you were dead on. Thanks for stopping by.

Justin

Kat said...

So how's the writing going Justin? Making any headway?

Elektra said...

Are you by any chance a Dave barry fan?

Anonymous said...

ha, ha. I pretend the paperclip is bill gates when I turn it off