With Continual Reference to Justin Kahn.

Tuesday, December 06, 2005

How Can You Help? Part One of a Never Ending Series

Since my blog was down for most of yesterday, you probably didn't read the remarks I recieved yesterday. You may do so now.

See? People want to help me. Not everyone hates me as much as you do. So back off.

There is amongst most of my readership, a strong desire to see me succeed at growing my hair.

When I read this outpouring of support I was really humbled. My long time readers probably remember
this ill-fated resolution

At the time, I was humiliated. But you guys watching me fail is what this blog is all about. And so, to think that maybe some of you want me to succeed at my new resolution, it's just touching.

How can YOU help? Just be my friend. That's all I really need right now.

Just kidding.

Growing my hair isn't something that is done in isolation.

Here's some ways you can help.

~Guest Blog. Would you like to share your alien abduction story? Do you want to give a testimonial about how conceptofirony has changed your life? Perhaps you already have a blog, and would like to cut and paste a hits collection. Submit these to me, and it will save me time--precious time that can be spent growing out my hair. Send your submission to me at Justin_Kahn@hotmail.com

~Donate a Word Did you know that applesauce is historically slang for nonsense. i.e. "Stop talking applesauce about my new hair style." Which is where you come in. Got old words, you aren't using? Do you have a word that might be helpful to me? If so, let me know. A lot of people have been impressed with my vocabulary. They say it is very crunk. I have great range. Any one who says otherwise is talking applesauce. Which isn't crunk. But a serious writer(like me) is always interested in getting more words to biggify his vocabulary.

~leave me alone Please stop asking me to explain what irony is to you. This takes away valuable brain power that could be used to grow my hair. I don't know what irony is. I am sorry that you googled irony, or teaching irony, or concept of irony and are confused as to what my blog has to do with those things. I'm sorry.

~Further more, please stop suggesting I change the name of the website to Kahnceptofirony. That is very clever, but that would mean changing the domain name and all kinds of other hastles. I am very forward thinking, but I don't want to overhaul the website. Not until I have enough hair to style. Sorry, Mom.

~Legal If you have some lawyering skillz then how about talking to me about the legalities of getting a Rambo haircut rather than simply shouting at me, to basically steal his style, which is a clear violation of intellectual property laws (cf. Rocky Balboa vs. Ivan Drago in Rocky IV)

~Tune in tomorrow.


Anonymous said...

please don't make your blog go down anymore.

Justin said...

I don't make my blog do anything.

If I did I might affect the quality, but probably not the direction.

Best wishes in your future works of literary criticism.