With Continual Reference to Justin Kahn.

Friday, April 06, 2007

Like a David Lynch Easter.

When I came home, I found this Easter Basket on my doorstep. There was no note, so I could only apply my psychic powers to solve this mystery.

Eventually it came to me: It must have been my landlord. Sure It and I have had our differences, about, for example, whose obligations it was to fulfill the things It said It would do in the contract.

But this changes everything doesn't it?

Of course I could say more and more about the sheer enthusiasm for life this Lynchesque turn of events has generated. But the fact is, the above picture was taken nearly an hour ago. Now most of the candy is gone. And my Bum-Gut (in the words of Rabelais) is calling me away from the computer.


maggie said...

I see that It gave you a Cadbury Cream egg. Don't worry, you didn't get bigger. They actually shrunk this year.

Justin said...

I'm glad you commented. Because I just responded to your (vebal)comment in yesterday's post.

Anyway good eye. I am going to be saving the Cadbury Egg of Happiness. I could pop in 7 hand fulls of jellybeans and 3 of the candy eggs, but I just couldn't rush the Cadbury Egg of Happiness.


Anonymous said...

Hi Justin,

I just arrived here from Monkeybicycle, where I read your "Parable about the Pleasures and Superiority of Realistic Fiction."

I liked it!

You know, maybe not as much as that cat in Over the Hedge liked the skunk. But a lot.

I can't believe you have archives going back to 1990. I'm shocked, shocked. Maybe not like when Claude Rains closes Bogart's club in Casablanca. But shocked nonetheless.

You should come check us out over at The Nervous Breakdown (www.thenervousbreakdown.com). We could use a writer like you.

Lieutenant The-Sonnet-Is-Not-Really-Dead, Just-Taking-the-Century-Off,
TNB Recruiter

Anonymous said...

Is it because I am jewish that the landlord did not leave me an easter basket??

Mary Lois said...

This is very odd. A rabbit was seen hopping away from my house this morning and there was a basket of strange-colored chicken eggs on the kitchen counter. Do you think this guy could have made it all the way to Cleveland?

Were there any chicken eggs in your basket or were they all candy?

Justin said...

Finding Fair Hope,
I have no problem believing your rabit story, but seriously: I can't believe you changed your name.

Anyway, there was nothing but candy and some shredded paper that I thought was candy, but really it was just shredded paper. That tasted awful.


Justin said...


No, I think it is because, well you aren't It's type. Sorry Kid-O.


P.S. You do know that it was Curtis and Jess, by which I mean Jess, that left the basket for me?

Justin said...

TNB recruiter,


I sure hope I end up on your page too! I have recieved rejection letters from like half of your contributors!


maleah said...

I'm dying my hair. Instead of eggs.