With Continual Reference to Justin Kahn.

Monday, June 26, 2006

Going to the Chapel, Gonna [sic] Get Married. Eventually.

I have never been so happy. I found a girl with whom I have entered into a mutually agreeable relationship: If I turn 85 and neither of us has married we are going to tie the knot. (Pictured: Bride-to-Be Lindsay, just seconds before three fingers and a thumb folded back)

It was all very romantic. Transcripts are provided once again courtesy the NSA with some faberications by COI:

Justin: I don’t want to die alone.
Lindz: What? Are you the guy from upstairs?
Justin: Maybe we should get married if we can’t find anyone else. Like when we are sixty.
Lindz(Hesitantly, Confused, Saddened): O.K.
Justin: You know life spans are getting longer these days. Maybe, we should just wait until 70. We don’t want to rush into a decision .
Lindz: Well,you know,do you think you are going to be living in the penthouse still? Because maybe 80 would be better. We’ll have both shriveled up and the penhouse would be more comfortable.
Justin: Oh believe me, I’m fine waiting. We could always wait until 85.
Lindz: Whatever.
Justin: Whatever.

Oh, dearest reader: you should have seen the look on her face when we came to the conclusion of our arrangements. You could see the excitement in her eyes, as she realized that the wedding she dreamed about as a child will finally be coming true, if absolutely all else fails, in her second childhood.

23 comments:

QUASAR9 said...

You one lucky guy Justin. She looks ravishing, radiating life!
All the best - Q.

Justin said...

Thanks Q. Hope you can make it to the wedding.

QUASAR9 said...

PS - Maybe Justin has got too many blogs. But hey horses for courses, some books/writers and thoughts need a full blog just for themselves. Otherwise they can turn into 'mental salad' - lol!

QUASAR9 said...

Justin said: "Hope you can make it to the wedding."

Who knows, it certainly sounds like it'd be worth making the time for. lol! laters - Q

bitingblondewit said...

But when you're 85, won't she want someone young enough to still be chasing her around the nursing home? Just asking...

Charlene Amsden said...

I think I'd best go back to that drawing of your penthouse and study it more closely. I don't remember seeing a wheelchair ramp.

I suppose it is too soon to tell us which medical supply house you're choosing for your wedding registry?

And -- it is Lindsay whose the lucky one. Could you imagine a more romantic proposal?

Justin said...

bitingblondewit: Haven't you ever seen those awesome wheelchair commercials where the elderly make it to the Grand Canyon in their chairs? Of course I'll be able to chase her around. It will be weird, like one of PKD's early novels but still. Wheeeeeeee! j.

Justin said...

quilly:
I guess you are right. Lindsay is pretty lucky.

No need to study the earlier diagram. I'm going to have a wheelchair with the Turbo Jump option. Like in Knight Rider.
irony

Charlene Amsden said...

Justin -- your news suprised me so that I forgot to say: I love the way you managed to compliment us both in your response to my blog. Nicely done.

(Btw, I'm taking lessons.)

Erratic Scribbler said...

Well, if she backs out for the lack of wheelchair ramp or because she's doesn't think Knight Rider is cool, you could always ask the Cumaean Sybil. She in her bottle could fit on one of your myriad mantles between your myriad myriad blog awards.

Oh, and if I make to 79 or more, I'll show up at your wedding and give you three miles of Scotch tape.

Mary Lois said...

I don't like this idea. I know you youngsters think you should wait, but as someone who has seen a lot of life I think the sooner you do it the better. Tell Lindsay the truth: If you wait, you may change your mind.

Oh, wait a minute. You're not doing it yet, are you? In that case, forget about my advice.

Rebecca said...

Not to sound crass, but what if she dies before you do? Then you would still be dying alone, all for naught. You better come up with a backup plan just in case.

Rebecca said...

Oh and btw - did you hear they're gonna make a movie out of Knight Rider? Rock.

bitingblondewit said...

A Hoverround?! I hate those with an absolute passion. My campus is overrun (so to speak) by the blasted things. Okay, maybe not overrun, but even one, in a narrow hallway, can be a pain. And the battery life seems to be short, which forces thoughtless people to climb over the poor person trapped in the thing...is that really want you want? If she's at all spry, you'll never catch her.

Justin said...

P T B:
I was totally interested in Cumaean Sybil. My only condition was that she would get botox. She refused.

See you at the wedding.

J D K

Justin said...

mary LOIS:
I think you will understand once you get to be my age.

Thank you for not giving up on me.

justin

Justin said...

Urbakon:
Of course I have a back up plan, for exactly the scenario you imagined. Three words for you: Weekend at Bernie's.
jKahn

Justin said...

bitingblondewit:
Where do you go to school? In the future?They don't even make hovercrafts around here.
justin

bitingblondewit said...

They're called Hoverrounds or Jazzy's. Did you see the commercial without the sound. HoverROUND not HoverCRAFT...see the difference?
And I go to school in Indiana...if anything, it's in the past. Waaay behind the times.

Mary Lois said...

Justin this does not seem to be something I can talk you out of. It is destined to be. If we're still around when it happens, Martha Stewart and I will do the catering. We'll never give up on you. Why, I don't know. Oh, maybe it's because you occasionally get my name right, Josh.

WIP said...

I used to visit my great grandpa in his nursing home and do wheelchair races with him down the halls, I did almost mowdown his lady friend. it was quite a sight, not to mention the numerous gentlemen flirting with the nurses.

I do believe that nursing homes can create romance... on many levels. *cough cough*

*blushes* hehe

-Wip

Nessa said...

I had an uncle who went through five different nursing homes before being taken home. He had too much romance with too many women who were too unwilling or unconscious.

What happens if you gets olds-heimers and don't remember Lindsey when you are 85? You better put your agreement in writing.

Anonymous said...

Can't you at least spell my name right, if we are going to get married and all?