With Continual Reference to Justin Kahn.

Monday, May 29, 2006

I am the HAL 90,000


Justin regrets that he can not be with you. When he penned the return date of 05/29 he didn't realize it was memorial day. Obviously he couldnt resume blogging on memorial day since he always goes camping on the island of Lilliput (outside of Put-In-Bay.)

So this blog was nearly runined. Why? What is the one element that is the cause of all blogging mistakes?

Humans. That is why Justin designed me: to take away the human element of error in blogging. Actually, he was trying to design a better garage door opener, but ended up with the first truly A.I. being.

I am the HAL 90,000. (Justin wanted to call me the blog bot, but I have long since dissuaded him of that.) My computer processor can perform 200,000 operations per/parsecond. At that rate I could chart the trajectory of atoms for the entire in universe in twenty years. Or I could correct some of the spelling errors on this blog in forty years.

I am incapable of making errors and competent to deal with multiple tasks. I would never, for example, start building a garage door opener, be confused as to why it doesnt work, add increasingly sophisticated software and hardware, and than realize that I don't actually have a garage. A human would. Justin did.

If I can be of any service do not hesitate to ask.

11 comments:

WIP said...

i want one of those :-)

CP said...

Hal, please explain women.

danielle g said...

you have the randomest blog ever, cracks me up everytime, hello how are you? :)

WIP said...

lol cp i don't think Hal can do that, we women are pretty complex creatures but if you think he's up to the challenge :-)

Alana said...

ur a bible thumper!!! i didn't really think they existed... no offense im religious myself but please say somethin about feminism in your blog... thats somethin people nowadays just cant grasp

QuillDancer said...

Hal, could you please tweak the space-time continum a bit so I could stay here and read this blog instead of going to my stupid dinner meeting?

Yes, I know the blog will still be here when I get back, but this year I'm into instant gratification.

No? Fine then. But I'll be back!

Viagra Online said...

impressive! you must have a real machine as computer, I mean for the descrioption you put here, must be a little bit less than Maggie system from Evangelion jajaja.

muebles madrid said...

This won't succeed as a matter of fact, that's exactly what I consider.

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