With Continual Reference to Justin Kahn.

Tuesday, March 06, 2007

Justin is Looking for Love With All of The Wrong Operating Systems (W/ Undertones of a Biting Satire of Mac Culture.)

(Justin Kahn played by the Studly John Hodgman; Curtis played by some other guy.)

Ordinarily I wouldn’t post on Tuesday, but I have such an exciting news to make that I simply had to share it with the world: The First Successful Spin-Off of Concept of Irony has entered the blogosphere.

In the quest for happiness, I asked my former man servant, why I haven’t been able to find a deep and meaningful relationship through the power of computers. Because the fact is, while I am great at being an Internet superstar, I don’t really understand much of the online world.

Justin: I keep trying fine dating sites. Yet, I am unable to find a girl

Curtis:(Looks at computer, shakes head disapprovingly) Well,look. Here is the problem. I’d say you should get Mac.

Justin: Are you saying the type of computer you use can alter your chances of finding your soul mate?

Curtis: Especially with the new vista system. That is crap. What I am saying is that if you have a Dell, you deserve to die alone. If you had a Mac, you probably would have found that special someone.

So as for me, I’m saving up for a mac.

As for you, if you ever need tech advice, be sure to visit Tech Review By Curtis O.K. maybe, right now Curtis hasn't written a single post. But give him time. Soon enough, Comrade K will be filling in for him.


maleah said...

Hey, I'm a Mac user. Where is the annoying tower? Nowhere. It's just a big, beautiful, 20 inch screen, a keyboard, and a mouse... oh, and some remote control I don't use. Come on, Justin, take a bite of the Apple. You'll suddenly be naked but smart. Probably naked because you won't be able to afford clothes...

Christina said...

I have a Dell PC and a brand-new Dell laptop. According to this article, I should be cursed with the double-Dell whammy of Chronic Singlehood. I definitely found my special someone despite this crippling Windows-related affliction. Perhaps it's because neither of my computers run Vista?

My boyfriend, however, does use Macs. Digest that information how you will.

Justin said...

I have no doubt that Mac's are the greatet invention ever, but the culture scares me.

Of course, if I could afford it I would buy dozens of them. Use them as placemats, because of their aesthetic qualities. No towers to get in the way of my mac n cheese.


Justin said...

My dear readers may not know this, so let me remind you and them that you can knit. That trumps all other relationship rules.

No doubt, if I could have knit my own hat, I would be engaged to audrey tautou by know.


Comrade Kevin said...

You know what they say, if you have a boyfriend who's a mac user that means you pretty much are boyfriends to every mac user. So if you buy a Mac Justin, you will be Christina's boyfriend by association.

Man, cults are strange things.

Justin said...

Comrade K,
And Maleah, my friend.

Life is pretty good.